This week, the latest episode of Saturday Night Live started in the Oval Office with a sketch featuring Donald Trump (played by James Austin Johnson) seated next to Stephen Miller (portrayed by Mikey Day) as they humorously listed a series of whimsical executive orders.
One of the first? A move to “make it socially acceptable for a man in his 70s to date a 24 year old.”
“We’re calling it the Belichick law,” Trump said. “We’re going to make girlfriends young again, OK. Old men can now date far younger women.”
He doubled down: “We like that. It’s hot. But in reverse, it’s quite disgusting, right?”
The joke hit on real-life headlines about 73-year-old UNC football coach Bill Belichick and his 24-year-old girlfriend, Jordon Hudson.
The skit dove headfirst into the absurdity of Trump’s world. Trump humorously boasted about having signed a total of 147 executive orders to date, which included directives to outlaw paper straws and cut funding for PBS.
“I understand Elmo has now been apprehended by ICE brought to you by the letter L for El Salvador,” Trump said. “He’s not coming back.”
Next came Stephen Miller, introduced as “lord of the shadows,” with Day playing him like a haunted Victorian doll.
While many of the orders were clearly far-fetched, some took a satirical swipe at actual policies. For instance, one executive order singled out interracial couples in commercials, serving as a pointed reference to the real actions of Trump’s FCC chair who had scrutinized media companies regarding diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts.
“It’s just too many, right?” Trump said. “You see them in the kitchen together making a meal from Hello Fresh. She’s got tight braids. You’re like, Where’d they meet, you know? What do they even talk about. It’s insane.”
Marco Rubio (Marcello Hernandez) made a cameo as Trump banned Hispanic babies from getting their ears pierced.
“I mean, we got grown white American tweens trying to get into Claire’s, and they gotta wait behind a thousand tiny Latina babies to get their ears pierced,” Trump complained.
The sketch closed with Trump rebranding “recession” as “recess.”
“Recession will now be called recess. Fun, right? So America, get ready for a historically long recess.”
You can watch the full sketch above.
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