“Rumors from the Inauguration: Donald Trump Jr’s Love Triangle with Kimberly Guilfoyle”

For many, this week’s inauguration turned the page on years of poisoned politics.

For seemingly insatiable love-hound Don Trump Jr., it also represented the chance for him to sample a saucy new chapter.

Recently, the President’s son ended his long relationship with Kimberly Guilfoyle. Despite the difficult breakup, Kimberly has shown unwavering loyalty to a President with whom she has had a close relationship for many years, dating back to his time as a civilian and her tenure as a Fox News anchor.

It’s a tale as old as Trump: Kim, 55, saw her MAGA-mance shatter when a decades-younger socialite waltzed into the picture last month. 

Palm Beach party girl Bettina Anderson, 38, was papped holding Doltish Don’s hand and it was all as good as over.

Adding to the humiliation, Donald Trump Senior revealed that he would be taking Kimberly to Greece in an ambassadorial capacity – leaving her with no choice but to accept graciously.

Since then, observers of the Trump family have been waiting anxiously to see if this tangled love triangle would disrupt the image of a flawless First Family during the inauguration.

In the end, it seems wily new Chief of Staff Susie Wiles got hold of the seating plan and artfully placed Don’s two leading ladies on opposite sides of the Rotunda floor. (Nowhere near the presidential party – and no chance of any handbag bashing!)

Just weeks ago, the First Son sloppily split with his years-long fiancée Kimberly Guilfoyle (pictured), who despite the brutal breakup has remained painfully loyal to a President with whom she’s long enjoyed a cozy relationship. 

Ever since, Trump watchers have been anxiously wondering aloud if this pointy love triangle would publicly pierce the façade of a perfect First Family at the inauguration (Kimberly is pictured at the inauguration). 

Palm Beach party girl Bettina Anderson, 38, was papped holding Doltish Don’s hand and it was all as good as over. (They are pictured together on January 18).

But what it signified to me is that while Kim might be on the out, she’ll never go away.  

For she supplies in spades the one thing Donald Trump demands: loyalty. She knows where the bodies are buried and, more important, truly believes that the MAGA mission trumps any desire to preserve her dignity and make herself scarce.

Outfitted in a few buxom revenge frocks and armed with her megawatt trout-pout, she danced and cavorted through DC this week at all of Don Jr.’s events, even appearing with him on stage at the Hispanic Inaugural Ball as if they were still sharing the same toothbrush.

And good for her. Because I couldn’t help but feel Kamala and Kimberly were having the same day on Monday – putting on an obligatory smile as they watched their rival snatch the job they so desperately wanted.

But at least Kimberly can comfort herself with this juicy nugget: I hear rumors that Team Trump is very concerned about the risks Don Jr’s new romance could pose to the administration, with the word ‘liability’ allegedly being used in more than one conversation to describe blonde Bettina.

One wonders: What does Bettina want out of this? Fame, access to power or, as one inside source suggested, a cushy role in the White House?

Kimberly danced and cavorted through DC this week at all of Don Jr.’s events, even appearing with him on stage at the Hispanic Inaugural Ball as if they were still sharing the same toothbrush (pictured).

One wonders: What does Bettina want out of this? Fame, access to power or, as one inside source suggested, a cushy role in the White House? (She is pictured in her inauguration attire).

Don appears to be betting the farm on Bettina – but, as a woman who’s lived a few lives myself, a word of advice: if you play your heart too fast and loose, many more people than your ex-fiancé will end up getting hurt.

Indeed, top of mind is Kai, Don Jr’s 17-year-old teen-fluencer who’s already living life faster than Grandad’s churning out executive orders.

But don’t cry for Kimberly just yet, Argentina. Her new Greek posting could turn out to be just the tonic.

In fact, for a woman who has a penchant for entertaining and hitching her wagon to influential men, the last laugh you hear might be from a Santorini terrace as she toasts to a poutier, more powerful next chapter.

Lauren’s rotundas

You gotta hand it to Lauren Sanchez for displaying her dowry at the inauguration in a peekaboo bridal-white brassiere that sent the assembled tech nerds through instant puberty.

I imagine Zuck was particularly happy to finally see the fleshy real deal after spending so much time in his Meta VR headset!

Hats off 

I, for one, appreciated the subtle nod to comical espionage in Melania’s ‘Spy vs. Spy’ kiss-proof chapeau.

It also hid her eyes so she could – perhaps – freely roll them at Dr. Jill and Kamala all day long.

I imagine Zuck was particularly happy to finally see the fleshy real deal after spending so much time in his Meta VR headset!

Best dressed 

Kai Trump stole the show in her gifted Sherri Hill gown.

The only missing accessory was a hat to match step-granny Melania and Auntie Ivanka. (They’re particularly useful for keeping your head on your shoulders amid all the temptation this second act as the First Family has to offer!)

Heil hoax 

Enough with the preposterous Elon-Nazi comparisons after the awkward and gangly billionaire was snapped with his hand outstretched after placing it on his heart and telling a crowd: ‘My heart is with you!’

Predictable progressives like AOC made it seem like his heart was with the Third Reich and called it a ‘Heil Hitler salute’.

Do these desperate Dems not have real jobs? Oh wait…