Marky Mark and the Phillip Street specialists



Due to fear of reprisal, Granny is withholding the identity of a contributor in order for them to speak freely. A Central Coast insider writes: “The game of golf has taken priority over recycling at the Everglades golf club in Woy Woy. The club’s GM has issued a notice to members expressing the board’s concern about ‘a number of members foraging in bins on the golf course to collect recyclable cans and bottles’. Members were threatened with disciplinary action if they continued this activity. One wonders what would happen if a ball landed in one of the bins. And why are the bins on the course if not for recycling? I guess it could have been worse. The board could have prohibited drinking on the course.”

Replying to Patrick Sutcliffe’s city query (C8), Tony Hunt of Gordon reckons that “in Brisbane they ask, ‘Who is your dermatologist?’”

“The start of winter, for some, can be related to the observation of certain migratory birds or appearance of specific flora,” notes Paul Stone of Little Bay. “However, I believe a more accurate measure is the onset of flinching each time you sit down on the toilet seat.”

More hymnody (C8), this time drafted by one of our very own: “While nowhere near the standard of poet laureate, I penned an Advent/refugee hymn a while back, full of socialist references, and had great fun setting it to Elgar’s great imperial music, Pomp and Circumstance March No.1 (Benson’s Land of Hope and Glory),” says Donald “Pinko” Hawes of Peel. “While everyone gave a great rendition, there were a few raised eyebrows from some of the more conservative members of the congregation. Someone said they guessed the author when they got to the line ending, ‘socially paranoid’.”

Judith Allison of Bexley needed a little help from her friends when viewing a foreign film (C8): “In the 1980s I was living in Munich and accompanied my two bilingual German companions to a documentary film about the Beatles. One of them was helpfully translating things in a whisper. It was when John Lennon started speaking that I had to remind him that I didn’t need his input with that.”

“In response to Charles Haran’s (C8) question regarding treatment for the Donald’s PTSD, I feel sure a companion animal would be well cared for, given Trump’s experience with Penthouse pets,” offers Simon Dixon of Bolton Point.

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