With lyrics like “my depression works the graveyard shift,” “Anti-Hero” isn’t your average brooding-pop star production — and neither is its music video. Written and directed by Taylor Swift (including the hilariously morbid funeral sketch), the video is ripe with nightmarish surrealism. Opening with Swift puzzling over a plate of two eggs, bacon, and a piece of broccoli, her past “ghosts” begin haunting her. None, however, scares Swift more than herself. As the chorus chimes in, “It’s me / Hi / I’m the problem, it’s me,” per Genius, she opens her door to find a dressed-to-party Swift. From influencing OG-Swift to down back-to-back shots at midnight, to convincing her that “everyone will betray you” (which glammed-up Swift scribbles on a chalkboard), this Party-Swift is a mess.
“Anti-Hero” only cuts deeper and deeper into Swift’s self-loathing. As she bemoans insecurities about her 5’11” frame, singing, “Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby / And I’m a monster on the hill / Too big to hang out,” a third, giant-sized Swift squeezes through a dining room door to join a social gathering, at which she’s decidedly unwanted.
The true shocker of the music video comes in a “Black Swan”-esque scene, in which OG-Swift steps onto a scale only for it to read, “FAT.” Party-Swift lurks in the back, taking it all in with an eerie smile. Given that Swift has shared her history of disordered eating in recent years, this scene is undoubtedly the most staunchly candid yet in her musical videography.
If you need help with an eating disorder, or know someone who is, help is available. Visit the National Eating Disorders Association website or contact NEDA’s Live Helpline at 1-800-931-2237. You can also receive 24/7 Crisis Support via text (send NEDA to 741-741).
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