A gay couple decided to have a child via surrogacy; however, when the time came to name the child, the husband’s parents claimed that their son’s final say was all that mattered because he was the child’s real father; What happened after drove a wedge between the in-laws and the other man.

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They say when anybody gets married, they also marry their in-laws as they constantly have to deal with demands from them one way or the other, and while many are lucky enough not to get saddled with nasty people, some are not so lucky. 

This was the case with this gay man who received an outrageous demand from his father-in-law and mother-in-law when they were invited over for a celebratory gender reveal.

A gay couple who decided to have a child via surrogacy ran into issues when it came to naming the child | Source: Pexels

A gay couple who decided to have a child via surrogacy ran into issues when it came to naming the child | Source: Pexels

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The man took to Reddit to ask people if his reaction to their frivolous demand was justified or over the top, but before delving into the morality, it’s best everyone understands where the man was coming from. 

The man described himself as a 32-year-old with a low sperm count and a lot of affection for his husband, 34, whom he had been married to for more than five years.

The pair had chosen to adopt a daughter, 3, at some point, and they loved her with their everything; however, when they started talking about having another kid, the pair decided that they would rather do it via surrogacy.

The pair had chosen to adopt a daughter, 3, at some point, and they loved her with their everything | Source: Pexels

The pair had chosen to adopt a daughter, 3, at some point, and they loved her with their everything | Source: Pexels

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However, because the man had a low sperm count, using his semen was off the table, which meant they had to use his husband’s, which was no problem at all. Having decided on that, they sought the help of one of their female friends, who agreed to donate one of her eggs to their cause. 

That went well, and soon their surrogate was pregnant with a child; It was a dream come through for the pair; however, trouble started seven months later when they invited their family and friends over for a gender reveal party at their home. 

Everyone they invited made it to the celebratory event except the surrogate, who lived far away in Canada; however, even she joined virtually via Zoom. The party kicked off in earnest, and soon it was revealed that the baby would be a boy.

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Everyone they invited made it to the celebratory event except the surrogate, who lived far away in Canada | Source: Pexels

Everyone they invited made it to the celebratory event except the surrogate, who lived far away in Canada | Source: Pexels

After that became evident, the man’s in-laws pushed for them to name the baby right then and there; The man had already decided on the name he wanted beforehand, but because he wanted to make his husband’s family feel valued, he kept that to himself and let them suggest names they wanted the child to have.

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The man even held out hope that perhaps they would pick the name he had, but nothing like that happened; in fact, he recorded that the only names they chose were some of the ones he did not like.

According to the man, they wanted the child to be named after their fathers, and while the man had no problems with other kids having names like that, he wanted something different for his son. 

The man's in-laws insisted that he pick one of their suggested names | Source: Pexels

The man’s in-laws insisted that he pick one of their suggested names | Source: Pexels

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Despite his feelings, he did not tell them straight off that he did not like the names; instead, he said they would think about it, thinking it would end the discussion. However, the in-laws insisted that he pick one of the suggested names, and when the man realized they would not back down, he revealed that he had already decided on a name. 

Again he expected that would deter them from pushing about the name, and again he was wrong because his father-in-law chose that time to tell him that the name he had decided on did not matter because his son was supposed to have the last say. 

“Sorry?” the man had said in disbelief, and his father-in-law had echoed her opinion saying:

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“yeah, my son has more rights to name the baby since he is the REAL dad.”

This infuriated the man, and his husband, who knew they were all headed for disaster, had become petrified into silence, leaving his partner to handle the problem alone. Before they could explain what they meant, the man grabbed them by the arms and deposited them outside the house.

The man's father-in-law told him that the name he had decided on did not matter because his son was supposed to have the last say | Source: Pexels

The man’s father-in-law told him that the name he had decided on did not matter because his son was supposed to have the last say | Source: Pexels

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After that, his husband came to his senses and said: “They are my parents and this wasn’t the way,” and it just led to more turmoil which eventually signaled the end of the party; then, when everyone left, his husband apologized on his parent’s behalf.

The following morning, his mother-in-law called his husband and declared that she was very disappointed in the man for how he behaved at the party and claimed that she was hurt.

After that, his sister-in-law also reached out to let him know that he overreacted and had been disrespectful because he did not give them the opportunity to explain themselves. 

Users who read the entry deemed that the man had not gone overboard, especially since he later revealed that he and his husband already had an agreement; he would name the male children they had while his partner named the girls. 

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The following morning, his mother-in-law called his husband and declared that she was very disappointed in the man for how he behaved at the party | Source: Pexels

The following morning, his mother-in-law called his husband and declared that she was very disappointed in the man for how he behaved at the party | Source: Pexels

One user stated that they could both do whatever works for them but having one parent name a particular gender meant someone could get hurt, and another user echoed the sentiment, stating that they might need to re-evaluate the decision, especially if they keep having male kids. 

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A different netizen who had parents who used the same method also weighed in, saying: “Eh, as long as both parents agree on the name chosen, it’s ok. My mom named me and my dad named my brother. lol. Guess who got named after a football coach? lol. (Just first name, middle name is 3rd generation family name on Dad’s side).”

While the comments are all valid, the man’s in-laws still think he went overboard. Do you think he did? Or was he too quick to react to what he believed was an insult to his person?

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