Parents Give Up 4-Year-Old Boy Two Years after Adopting Him: ‘It’s Been Really Hard’

A couple, who were already parents of three children, chose to expand their family by adopting a boy from another country. They even shared their emotional adoption journey on social media. However, later, their followers noticed that the boy no longer appeared in their posts.

Myka Stauffer and her husband, James Stauffer, have been sharing their lives on YouTube since 2014, with Myka’s channel having 717,000 subscribers and their family channel, “The Stauffer Life,” with 332,000 subscribers, as reported in May 2020.

At the beginning of their vlogging journey, they had one daughter together, and Myka had a daughter from a previous relationship. Over time, they welcomed two sons, whose pregnancies and births were also documented on their channel.

The couple’s journey began in the fall of 2016 when Myka and James decided adoption was the right path for their family. After having three biological children, Nakova, Jaka, and Radley, Mika felt the time was right to explore adoption.

The attorneys further expressed their sympathy for the couple, acknowledging the devastating impact of the decision on any parent.

Initially, they considered various adoption routes, but they were drawn to international adoption and specifically looked into adopting from Africa. However, they shifted their focus to China due to ethical issues and a temporary shutdown of the Ethiopian adoption program.

The Chinese adoption laws limited them to adopting children with special needs, which they initially hesitated about. But, after further consideration, their hearts were softened, and they became open to adopting a child with almost any special need.

The Ohio parents found a little boy, Huxley, whose file indicated brain damage and a brain tumor. Myka, being an oncology nurse, wasn’t deterred by the tumor and felt an instant connection to the boy, whose birthday was just one day before hers. Thereafter, she and James went through the adoption process and finally met Huxley in China, making it a memorable and emotional experience for the whole family.

When they returned home, they were surprised to discover that Huxley had additional health issues not accurately mentioned in his file. He had experienced a stroke in utero and was diagnosed with level 3 autism and sensory processing disorder.

This required them to readjust and adapt to his needs, but they were committed to providing him with the best care and support. Huxley was four years old at the time and had started to form words and use sign language. He received 30 hours of ABA therapy per week and attended a private preschool to help him reach his full potential.

Myka and her husband remained passionate about international adoption throughout the challenges, considering it a beautiful and enriching experience. They believed adoption had made them better parents to all their children.

In addition to adopting Huxley, Myka and James welcomed their fifth child, Onyx Trey Stauffer, in June 2019. Onyx joined older brothers, Radley and Huxley, along with sisters Jaka and Nakova, completing their loving and diverse family. Little did they know how things would drastically change for their family over the next 12 months.

After adopting Huxley, Myka and James faced significant challenges with his care. Huxley had severe developmental issues, including speech and language difficulties, and displayed repetitive behaviors like rocking and head-banging. However, despite these obstacles, they were committed to providing him the love and support he needed.

Myka documented their adoption journey on her YouTube channel, sharing emotional videos and updates about Huxley’s progress. She organized fundraisers to support his unspecified needs and garnered a substantial following, becoming a prominent parenting blogger.

In the late winter of 2019 and early spring of 2020, followers began to notice that Huxley had stopped appearing in Myka and James’ videos and posts. One of Mika’s last posts featuring Huxley was on February 16, 2020, where she discussed the challenges of dealing with his special needs.

As the days passed, Huxley’s absence from their online presence became more apparent, and followers started asking for updates about him. Some even created Instagram accounts, like “Justice for Huxley” and “MykaStaufferFan,” to seek answers and pressure Myka to address the situation. However, she remained mostly silent about Huxley’s disappearance, leaving her audience confused and concerned.

On Mother’s Day in 2020, Myka wrote that it was the “hardest” holiday she’d ever experienced, further fueling curiosity about Huxley’s well-being. The situation prompted followers to inquire about Huxley’s whereabouts, but Myka did not provide a clear response.

In September 2019, Myka posted a YouTube video updating her fans on Huxley’s two-year adoption anniversary. However, the confusion continued as Huxley was no longer visible in her recent content. Myka’s Twitter bio indicated that she now had four children, implying that Huxley was no longer part of their publicly acknowledged family.

But the lack of further updates and his disappearance from her videos and photos raised questions and speculation among her followers.

In May 2020, the YouTuber couple announced that they had decided to place their adopted son Huxley with a new family due to his special needs and behavioral challenges. The decision caused a wave of anger on social media, with viewers expressing outrage and questioning the couple’s ethics.

The Ohio residents clarified that it was not an easy decision for them, and they deeply loved Huxley with all their hearts. A distraught James expressed:

“For us, it’s been really hard hearing from the medical professionals, a lot of their feedback, and things that have been upsetting. We’ve never wanted to be in this position. And we’ve been trying to get his needs met and help him out as much as possible…we truly love him.”

Despite their difficult choice, the Stauffers emphasized that Huxley was thriving and happy in his new home with a family that could meet his unique needs.

Following the announcement, the social media firestorm intensified, with many users expressing their disappointment and frustration with Myka and James. Some critics used the hashtag “cancel Myka Stauffer” to voice their disapproval, and a change.org petition was created, urging the removal of all monetized videos featuring Huxley from YouTube.

Myka and James’ attorneys, Thomas Taneff and Taylor Sayers, released a statement defending their clients’ decision in response to the situation. The attorneys stated that Huxley had not been placed in the foster system; instead, the couple had hand-picked a family capable of meeting his needs. They highlighted that the Stauffers had done everything possible to provide Huxley with the best possible treatment and care.

The attorneys further expressed their sympathy for the couple, acknowledging the devastating impact of the decision on any parent. They emphasized that the placement decision was made with Huxley’s best interests in mind and was not taken lightly.

Amid the controversy and public backlash, authorities confirmed that Huxley was safe, well taken care of, and had transitioned smoothly into his new environment. He was said to be happy under the supervision of his new adoptive family. The local sheriff’s office in Ohio closed its case after meeting with Huxley and his prospective adoptive parents, finding no signs of abuse or legal issues with the adoption process.

In June 2020, Myka eventually broke her silence and expressed remorse for her actions, admitting that she had been naive and ill-prepared to raise a special-needs child. She acknowledged the heartbreak she caused many people and regretted not sharing more of her story from the beginning.

Do you agree with the parents’ decision to place the boy with another family better suited to his needs? Click here to read another story about an Indiana couple who abandoned their adopted daughter thinking she was 22. Later, the girl spoke after her birth mom confirmed her age.